Author Posts

September 27, 2019 at 12:24 pm

Hold no resentment:
Holding on to the negative emotions can just negatively affect your own wellbeing. Figure out how to excuse others. Excusing keeps the relationship sound, yet additionally fends off you from stress and negative feelings.

September 30, 2019 at 8:16 am

acknowledgment of why you are angry is more important than using anger. Being aware of the reasoning for the anger is in a way using that anger. Going through the emotional breakdown internally through quiet meditation or alone time away from everyone that you can potentially harm by saying or expressing yourself.

It is perfectly normal for us to go through the feeling of anger at the same time evaluating the reason for the feeling. Reflecting on what brought it is very important. Accepting the truth whether it is a decision of self inflicted or a perception you chose from someone to be an asshole.

We have to be strong enough to change the process and use the lessons from our feeling of anger.

November 7, 2019 at 6:38 am

Adopting below methods will definitely work for you. Read attentively and act accordingly.

Take long breathe, slowly. Repeat at least 5-6 times. Then think, is it really worthy to be so much angry, being irritating, shouting or frowning. If not then please be poised and mull over the issue. Sometimes a normal discussion / actions can solve most of the issues.
Sometimes no reaction is better to avoid conflict. Be silent or walk away politely from the tense surrounding. After half an hour or little long time you may praise yourself for not showing your anger. Some actions are better felt after passing that “particular” non-favourable moment.
Calculate the outcome of your anger. If the outcome is devastating then it’s better to ignore the issue. Although you are not hulk, iron man or any super hero to control all the factors in your favour.
Ego is the key to most of the conflicts. Have less ego and you can normalise the situations in better manner. There is difference between Ego and self-respect.
Be mature while behaving. Immature act may lead to unfavourable conditions.
Be wise to avoid mistakes and try not to give others a chance to pick a point for arguments. Sometimes we got angry after other’s arguments.
If you are always succumbed to your anger then i suggest suppress it inside your mind and hit the gym or do yoga / meditation for stress relieving.
Choose wisely which things should be taken care of. Don’t give fuck to everything you didn’t want to happen. Read the book “The subtle art of not giving fuck” by Mark manson. It will help you to realise the need to change your view points / perspective.

November 7, 2019 at 8:23 am

Please ask yourself the following questions & answer frankly

Do You Have a fierce temper
Are there people who can make you angry without doing anything
Are there people who can push your triggers to make you lose your cool
Have you lost anger in a big way & in that angry state took actions that you regret
Do you think anger is bad
Do you think anger should be controlled
Are you always simmering in anger
Have you started losing your cool frequently & regularly since recent times
Is your anger costing you your happiness, your peace, your relationship, creating financial losses & loss of reputation
Do you lose your cool only in family or in professional & social scenario as well
Now if you answer yes to any of the above. You need to identify, learn & practice the effective techniques to channelize your anger in a constructive and positive manner.

It is a tough & up-hill task, yet possible with practice.

A.First identify your triggers, what of the following makes you lose your marbles

1.Being Insulted

2.Being Belittled

3.Being Humiliated

4.Being Embarrassed

5.Falsely blamed

6.Being Mocked

7.Being put down

8.Being Dominated

9.Being suppressed

10.Being pressurized into doing things against your values

11.Being threatened

12.Being harassed

13.Being Lied or because of giving false excuses given by others

14.Being criticized

15.Because of Unwarranted Name calling

B.Check the following for the probable underlying causes for what makes you lose your temper & cool at fraction of second

Do you always been angry person
Do you have the family history of blood pressure/hyper tension & anger and diabetes etc
Do you get easily irritated
Can you identify which people, which situations & which words make you lose your temper
Are you yet to get healed from a traumatic experience
Do you tend to worry or overthink or keep reflecting on what people said the negative ones
Do you have mood swings so that suddenly you feel angry, sad or low
Are you going through relationship issues
Have you had lots of traumatic experiences
Have you been failing at lot in whatever you are trying
Are you having problem at work or finding work
Are you financially troubled
Do you tend to take jokes etc personally
Do you have low self-esteem
XV.Have been used to drinking, using drugs or mood enhancers etc
Have you been the only child & been spoilt by getting all your demands met
Do you tend to overreact
Does seeing other people having good time & you having lousy times makes you feel cheated
Are you aware that your anger hurts people whom you love deeply
Are you aware that your loved are scared of you & worried about your anger
But you have to understand that none of the above can be a reason to hurt others & cause damage to you & others

C. Now Identify your anger types, pattern or style – there could be following ways you get angry

I. Your temper shots up in an instant, mercury rises to the top & explodes & it takes a lot to make you cool down – in this state you can do anything & harm others. Road rage is an example

II. You get angry fast but get calm down also quite fast – in this state you may say bad things that you may regret later, but you are unlikely to harm anybody else

III. You are blind wit internal rage & people with this type would definitely have emotional issues & many physical ailments & brain hemorrhage or similar attacks

IV. Destructive Anger, When you lose you cool – you break things, throw things, even the most useful & expensive items you would throw

V. Revengeful anger – in this you definitely get angry but do not show and coolly plan your revenge and for that you may wait maybe months, years. Cold blooded murder may come under this VI. Self-destroying anger – you suppress you anger within & start blame, criticizing, belittling yourself

VII. Passive-aggressive anger, you are too angry, but as you are submissive you show that you are okay. But do all the things to harm without getting blamed for the damage done

VIII. These are the people who are perpetually irritated, sometimes they can fight even with the wind on why it is blowing

IX. Then there are people who maintain complete cool in one situation & lose it completely in another situation

X. Then there are people with psychological disorders, who are so nice & cool in front of outsiders, but make the life hell for their closest ones

XI. Then there are people who understand what angers you, you try to avoid those people & situation. If forced into same, you would go away to ignore and avoid the trigger as soon as possible

XII. These type of people, use the tremendous energy of their anger to create something extra-ordinary for themselves or for the world What to do if you are on the verge of losing your temper – if you can recognize that you are about to get angry beyond control, that in itself if by practice can lower your anger to less troublesome level.

Anger is generally a reaction of triggers pressed my others & many time by ourselves.

This also could be a sign of your not able to deal with the situation or person effectively.

Tips to manage, channelize & provide healthy outlet for your anger – to read further please visit my blog in my website on How to Manage Anger

November 7, 2019 at 9:31 am

I have been through the same position as you are having right now. My friend, my experience has taught me that how terrible foe is anger for a person. I appreciate that you are seeking answers for it. Now let me tell you few methods which helped me:

Meditation. It really helps. If you do it properly, it gets you rid of sorrows you had. For beginners its advisable to meditate at least for 5 minutes. Generally the minimum time is 20 minutes.
Whenever you are angry, try to count numbers and don’t stop till you have control on yourself;
Try to get out of your house and get some fresh air, stroll for fun.
Inculcate a hobby;
Make sure you don’t stay lonely for most of the time of your day;
Try to mingle with people as much as possible.
Remember one thing, whenever you get suicidal thoughts, try to recall your loved ones-parents or any one. You don’t want to see them sad or depressed.

All the best

November 7, 2019 at 11:34 am

Just follow these steps:

Don’t say anything. Just look at them while they shout.
Wait until they are finished.
Ask them if they are finished. If they say yes, say either:
Do you feel better now? Then continue on as if they said nothing.
Nothing. Just continue on as if they said nothing.
I like this method because it puts them out on a limb by themselves. Don’t walk out on that limb with them. It makes them look silly because they’re alone out there.

This works for children having temper tantrums as well.