Have low expectations but high standards.
I had two dates tonight.
They both flaked.
I always expect things not to work out.
For people to die.
For the world to end.
For Trump to be President.
I always accept the absolute worse case.
I expect very little from life.
Life is capricious, so I treat her as such.
I am not capricious.
I am in control of my actions.
I control whether I’m disciplined.
I control whether I’m courageous.
I control whether I’m resilient.
So when it comes to my actions I have very high standards because it’s the one thing in life I have control over.
Do not have EXPECTATIONS – Its very difficult! But thats the “Key”.
If something happens as per your wish that’s a BONUS! If it doesn’t… Well! God has planned something better than what i wished for.
Keep things SIMPLE! Do not complicate them especially your relationships
Work hard, spend time with yourself so that you understand yourself better and know how exactly to deal with yourself – (Most difficult one to convince is my own self At least for me!)
Your heart is like a Monkey (As some buddhist said) so train it and tame it
1. Don’t overthink, overthinking leads to negative thoughts.
And also, don’t think too much about “what people will say”. They are cowards. Don’t worry about them. Keep walking on your path (whichever you have choosed).
2. Your heart knows the way. Run in that direction. Heart gives you intutions and intutions are the gips of soul.
3. Go easy on yourself… “whatever you do today, let it be enough for you”.
If you are in pain, then there is something, you are attached with. So detached from it. Because “If there is no attachment, then there is no grief”.
Don’t scratch your mind too much, you find nothing under it, except “depression”.
Do not react on everything, sometime sit back and only do …….Inhale and Exhale.
Wake up early in the morning.
My Father can’t remember the names of things anymore.
For example, a “Boarding Pass”.
He can’t recall the words, but he is able to rename it so we know what he’s trying to say – he’ll call it a “Plane Get-On”.
When he tells me a story of something he did that day, he often refers to my Mother as my Sister (I don’t have a Sister, I have 2 Brothers), or sometimes he’ll call her his Mother. He calls my Son by my Brother’s name. He knows what he’s trying to say, but his brain won’t comply. He gets confused.
My Father will be 93 on June 8.
He fought in WWII, drafted into battle at the tender age of 19. His troop helped liberate the concentration camp in Dachau, Germany. He witnessed unimaginable grief, coupled with breathtakingly triumphant relief. A cannon went off near where he was stationed, and he permanently lost hearing in his left ear. Currently, his right ear is probably 20% at best, and that’s with a hearing aid that is constantly lost.
He has had 2 open heart surgeries, an aortic valve replacement, a pacemaker and a few stents put in.
His fingers are so twisted up with arthritis, it’s hard to believe he used to play the violin in a symphony orchestra.
His reflexes are impaired, so we took his Driver’s License away several years ago to help him and everyone else be safe on the road.
His back aches from spinal stenosis, so we put in a chair lift to help him be safe going up and down the staircase.
My Mother prepares a pillbox every Sunday evening that consists of that week’s daily dose of myriad medications that he needs to take at varying intervals.
He knows he’s losing his mind. He’s also well aware that his wife, my mother, the woman he’s been married to for the past 63 years, is losing her patience in dealing with him.
I can only imagine how frustrating each day must be for him. It’s disheartening and sad for me.
Yet, every morning, my Father takes that chair lift down the stairs.
He makes a pot of coffee for my Mother, who will wake up 2 hours later and come downstairs to drink it.
He walks outside to the driveway, bends down to pick up the New York Times and puts it on the kitchen table for her to read while she’s sips her hot brew.
He cuts himself a slice of perfectly ripe cantaloupe and after he puts the spoon up to his mouth and swallows a bite, he exhales an audible, “Mmmmmm” in delight.
He answers my phone calls, and tells me about what he did yesterday. While his sentences are a bit jumbled and difficult to follow, they are peppered with words like, “Marvelous” and “Fantastic”.
My Father is not sad.
He is happy for every single day that he has the ability to take that chair lift down the stairs. He’s grateful to be able to walk out to the driveway to pick up the paper, to pick up the telephone to talk with me, and to pick up that perfectly ripe spoonful of cantaloupe.
He has always shown tremendous gratitude for life’s small pleasures. It adds up to a large amount of happiness, and a beautiful, long existence on this planet.
1: Respect Traditions
Many traditions look outdated and irrational. It is easy to ridicule the old traditions and scoff at the people who follow them. However, it is the traditions that connect different generations and different strata of society. You may or may not follow them in totality, but don’t disrespect people who follow the traditions.
2: Don’t Compare
You can never be happy in life if you can’t get rid of the habit of comparing yourself with others. There will always be someone who is more intelligent, more powerful, wealthier or good looking than you, and that would always make you feel inferior. If at all you should compare, compare with what you have and not what you lack.
3: Be Contented
There is no end to greed. The entire wealth of the world can’t satisfy your greed which seems to grow at double the pace of your acquisition. You must develop contentment once your basic needs are reasonably satisfied.
4: Enjoy Freedom
There is no joy in bondage. If your soul is not free, you can never enjoy happiness. In the interconnected world where we live, there is no possibility of absolute freedom and it is futile to crave for it. However, all the restrictions are only applicable to physical level. You can be free spiritually and emotionally to a great extend by making yourself less dependent upon others.
5: Don’t Sell Your Soul
If you gain the world and lose your soul, it is of no value. You can always rise if you fall in the eyes of the world, but you can never rise if you fall in your own eyes. Never do anything that you feel ashamed of yourself when you stand before the mirror.
6: Enjoy the Spectrum of life
The life is beautiful because it has so many colours in it. You must never expect everyone to follow you or think like you. Appreciate the diversity in the world and learn to respect the different points of view of the people.
7: Experiment with Life
Life is like flowing water. If you trap this water in inside a stagnated pond, it starts stinking soon. You must always experiment in your life so that you can learn new things and enjoy the different aspects of life. Experiments make you wiser and better prepared to face the challenges of life.
8: Learn from Everyone
The greatest minds of the world are those who had never stopped learning. While common people learn from books and famous people, the wise people learn from everyone. When you develop this habit, you start respecting everyone since everyone is like a teacher to you.
9: Enjoy the Journey of Life
While most people wish to achieve great things in life, they often miss the entire journey of life since as soon as they reach one goal, they get busy in planning for the next. Don’t waste life in chasing dreams. Wake up, open your eyes and love the world.
10: Don’t Use Power
It is natural to seek power and use all the power under your command to get quick results. However, every application of power creates hatred in the heart of a people against whom it is used. You must rather try to persuade the people to do the job and inspire them from your own actions than to use the power and spoil the relationship. Exercise of power must be the last resort.
11: Value Relationships
The most important source of happiness is solid human relationships you build over years. You don’t lose sleep in night while losing a few thousand bucks if you have a million bucks in the bank. In the same way, if you have invested in relationships, you will always find shoulders to cry and people to share your pain.
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